WikiHow is the dumbest thing ever
WikiHow is seriously, like, the dumbest thing ever.
If you aren’t familiar with it, WikiHow, located at wikihow.com, is a wiki (collaboratively-edited online project) filled with how-to guides. Now, at first it makes sense that people would write how-to guides for each other. But here’s why it doesn’t work in practice: would you take advice from a random person online? Okay, well, some people would. But even if you were one of these people, would you take advice from the type of person who would write pro bono advice on an advice wiki?
I mean, if you needed advice on kissing, would you listen to somebody who sits around all day writing kissing guides on websites? I sure as hell wouldn’t. Just curious–with all the time he spends writing how-to guides, how often does he actually get kissed? I mean, I’ll admit that I spend lots of time online, but (a) I don’t write kissing guides, and (b) the last time I was kissed I had no urge to run to a computer to document my findings.
I’m not sure how to show you how stupid WikiHow is–and WikiHow doesn’t have a guide for how to do that, either–but I think that these examples will be more than enough.
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How to Show Others You Are Not a Lesbian: I mean, I understand that some girls have this issue, but I don’t think this guide transcends the bleeding obvious. Step 7 reads, and I quote, “Tone down your masculine traits for example being super loud, punching people etc.”
How to Talk to a Guy Over the Phone: “Talking on the phone sounds easy, right? Wrong! Not once you get to the part of talking in reality!” Hi Brad, I, uh, SHIT WHAT DO I SAY AGAIN I’M TOO BUSY THINKING ABOUT HIS PENIS TO KNOW WHAT TO SAY
How to Meet Boys While Attending an All Girls High School: gee I dunno maybe you should get off this stupid website and on the nearest boy you can find I hear they appreciate that kind of thing
How to Make Use of Your iPod: The first step is seriously “Get an iPod.” I’m not even kidding.
How to Appreciate Goth Music: Step 5 is “Realize it is not scary.” That alone makes me want to avoid all of the artists mentioned in the article.
How to Court a Christian Girl: Step 1: “Find yourself a good Christian girl. Good places to look might be church” hahahahahahahahahah
How to Create Small Scale Anarchism: Wait, this isn’t really an article, is it? Is it?
How to Turn off a Street Light: Quick, Albus, the put-outer! Oh wait, this is a serious article. Shine a flashlight at the light sensor? laaaaame
How to Be a Sex Kitten Like Brigitte Bardot: Step 10: “Spread your name, you don’t want to waste your time becoming a sex kitten for nothing.” They did not just seriously say that.
How to Effectively Convince Others That You Are a Woman Without Getting a Sex Change (Guys): Step 1: “Smooth your face. A heavy beard is a dead giveaway.”
How to Sex Dwarf Hamsters: hey jimmy let’s go sex some dwarf hamsters giggle
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Ahh, it feels good to flame websites.